Genesis: Chapter 1 – The Spawning In the beginning, there was 0 Rizz. The map was totally empty, just a void in Ohio. And the earth was mid; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of the Sigma moved upon the face of the Skibidi waters. And the Admin said, “Let there be RTX ON”: and there was Light. And the Admin saw the light, that it was Peak. And the Admin divided the Light from the Brainrot. And the Admin called the light "Aura," and the darkness he called "The L-Ratio." And the evening and the morning were the first day. And the Admin said, “Let there be a Firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the Fanum Tax from the Grimace Shake.” And the Admin made the sky and separated the water-rizz from the cloud-rizz; and it was Fr Fr. And the Admin called the sky "The Lobby." And the evening and the morning were the second day. And the Admin said, “Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together into one place, and let the Dry Land spawn.” And the Admin called the dry land "The Map"; and the gathering together of the waters called he "The Sauce": and the Admin saw that it was Low-key Fire. And the Admin said, “Let the Map bring forth Grass (which no one shall touch), and herbs that give off the Zaza, and the Fruit Tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself.” And the Map spawned the vegetation, and the Admin saw it was a Massive W. And the evening and the morning were the third day. And the Admin said, “Let there be LEDs in the firmament of the Lobby to divide the day from the night.” One big LED to rule the Day (The Sun-Sigma) and one small LED to rule the night (The Moon-Mewing). He made the Stars also (The Twitch Subs). And the evening and the morning were the fourth day. And the Admin said, “Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creature that hath life, and fowl that may fly above the map in the open firmament of the lobby.” So he created great whales (The Discord Mods) and every living creature that glideth. And the Admin blessed them, saying, “Be fruitful, and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let fowl multiply on the map.” And the evening and the morning were the fifth day. And the Admin said, “Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind: cattle, and creeping thing, and beast of the earth: let there be Capybaras and Doggos.” And the Admin said, “Let us make Man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have Dominance and Maximum Rizz over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over all the NPCs on the earth.” So the Admin created Man in his own image; in the image of the Sigma created he him; male and female created he them. And the Admin blessed them, and said unto them, “Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: go forth and Cook.” And the Admin saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was The GOAT. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day. Genesis: Chapter 2 – The Garden of Ohio Thus the lobby and the map were finished, and all the host of them. And on the seventh day the Admin ended his work which he had made; and he Mewed on the seventh day from all his work which he had made. And the Admin planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed. And out of the ground made the Admin to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight, and good for food; the Tree of Life also in the midst of the garden, and the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Cringe. And the Admin commanded the man, saying, “Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat: But of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Cringe, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt lose thy Aura and catch a permanent L.” And the Admin said, “It is not good that the man should be a solo-player; I will make him a Duo partner.” And the Admin caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam (The First Rizzler), and he took one of his ribs. And the rib, which the Admin had taken from man, made he a woman (The First Gyatt), and brought her unto the man. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were No Cap not ashamed. Genesis: Chapter 3 – The Skill Issue Now the Serpent was more Delulu than any beast of the field which the Admin had made. And he said unto the woman, “Wait, did the Admin actually say you can’t eat from every tree? That’s mid.” And the woman said, “We can eat the fruit, but if we touch the Tree in the middle, we get banned.” And the Serpent said unto the woman, “You won't get banned, Fr Fr. For the Admin knows that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as Sigmas, knowing Good and Cringe.” And when the woman saw that the tree was fire, and that it was aesthetic to the eyes, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat. And the eyes of them both were opened, and they realized they were lagging. They sewed fig leaves together and made themselves skins (The first Microtransactions). And they heard the voice of the Admin walking in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Admin among the trees of the garden. And the Admin called unto Adam, and said unto him, “Where you at? I see your red dot on the mini-map.” And he said, “I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.” And he said, “Who told thee that thou wast naked? Didst thou eat of the tree I told you was off-limits? That’s a Major L.” And the man said, “The woman thou gavest me for a Duo, she gave me the fruit, and I did eat. It was a total setup.” And the Admin said unto the Serpent, “Because thou hast done this, thou art cursed. Upon thy belly shalt thou go, and dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life. You are the ultimate NPC.” Unto the woman he said, “I will greatly multiply thy sorrow; thy husband shall rule over thee, and you're gonna have to pay the Fanum Tax.” And unto Adam he said, “Because thou hast listened to thy Duo instead of the Admin, cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life. In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return. No Rizz. No Aura. Just mid.” Therefore the Admin sent him forth from the garden of Eden, to till the ground from whence he was taken. So he drove out the man; and he placed at the east of the garden of Eden Skibidi Cherubims, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to keep the way of the Tree of Life. Thus ended the first session. The lobby was corrupted. The Great Grind had begun.